Babyfic: Merry Cheese-mas
Dec. 22nd, 2007 07:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
You guys, I wish you all a
Merry Christmas or Frohe Weihnachten, Happy Chanukkah, Bon Noèl... In short have yourself some Nice Holidays. *waves*
Also, because I feel bad-eroni for not getting the next chapter of Horseman up before Christmas (though believe me in this case faster wouldn`t have been better in any way *g*), I bring a little offering in the spirit of Christmas. A schmoopy little vignette in the Cheeseverse
Title: Merry Cheese-mas
Pairing/Rating: Jared/Jensen, NC-17
Genre: RPS AU, Crack
Summary: Jared learns the wonders of Christmas
Word count: 742
Disclaimer: I own jack, least of all Jared and Jensen. This is also very, very much fiction.
Nearly one whole year had passed since a benevolent fairy had granted Jared's wish, and he was adapting to human life quite well. His job as a taste tester was going great, and life - as well as sex - with his Jensen was glorious and only getting better as the days went on. Sure, sometimes Jensen could be "high maintenance" as humans used to call it, like the time he had spotted their videos on the Internet. Jensen had been so unreasonable, claiming Jared couldn't just tape them during lovemaking and then share the experience with other people online.
And no matter how many times Jared had pointed out how incredibly popular they were, how many enthusiastic fan mail they received, Jensen hadn`t relented. In the end a deeply put-upon Jared had been forced to take down "Bendy Jensen", the Website Jared had so lovingly created in hours upon hours of work. Jensen hadn't even seemed very sorry about it. Thankfully Jared was a very generous and forgiving individual. At least with Jensen he was gladly so accommodating but with others it seemed a bit unfair that Jared should always be the one to make sacrifices because that stupid saying proclaimed that "the bigger person would do so" and Jared usually was the biggest person around.
Now though every grievance was forgotten because a special time of the year had arrived, and Jared was vibrating with excitement. He had come to love human holidays because usually they involved the consumption of lots and lots of food. So far there had been Egg-Day, Pie-Day and his current favourite Turkey-Day. Jensen used other names for them but Jared didn't understand this need to not call things like they truly were.
Jared couldn't imagine anything beating Turkey Day but Jensen assured him this "Christmas" thing would be even better as not only there would be the usual food but also the exchange of nice presents. And since nothing could be better than food Jared assumed said presents would also consist of edible goods. Double score.
"Christmas" also came with a couple of neat traditions. For one there was this mistle toe and while the general idea appealed to Jared very much, it clearly needed some improvement still. So when Jensen came home that evening he found the apartment covered in little pieces of cheese, which Jared had seemingly hung up everywhere. Not that he had the chance to verify this assessment because Jared grabbed him and proceeded to happily kiss him under each and every piece, slowly walking them to the bedroom where Jensen promptly forgot about everything but the way Jared's thrusts nearly drove him straight through the headboard.
Then there was Santa, as Jared understood it a fat man in a thick red coat who would come at night and bring their food-presents. Jensen tried to explain how this Santa-person didn't exist and was a made-up figure for small children but Jared didn't want to take any risks on his first official Christmas as a human. After all benevolent fairies were said to be imaginary too and yet if not for one of them Jared would still pine away after Jensen in his little hole in the wall.
So he put out the plate with cookies, right next to their little Christmas tree with the cheese ball decorations. He looked forward to finding lots and lots of presents under the tree by morning. Jared was good at math and if one added up the presents Jared himself had for Jensen, the ones Jensen surely had for him in return and Santa's presents for both of them, well, that should equal lots.
He tried to stay awake to sneak some glance at Santa but Jensen called to him from the bedroom and well, one had to have priorities. Jensen was already on the bed, naked except for the big red bow wrapped around him and the Santa hat on top of his head. He wore a wide, happy grin and beckoned Jared to him.
"You may open your first present right now."
Jared grinned back. Not all presents needed to be food to look good enough to eat after all. He wondered if in the sense of Christmas spirit Jensen would be willing to share with the downtrodden this time. If Jared put some work into it, "Bendy Jensen" could be up and running again by noon tomorrow. Still, first they clearly needed new material…
* * *
Merry Christmas or Frohe Weihnachten, Happy Chanukkah, Bon Noèl... In short have yourself some Nice Holidays. *waves*
Also, because I feel bad-eroni for not getting the next chapter of Horseman up before Christmas (though believe me in this case faster wouldn`t have been better in any way *g*), I bring a little offering in the spirit of Christmas. A schmoopy little vignette in the Cheeseverse
Title: Merry Cheese-mas
Pairing/Rating: Jared/Jensen, NC-17
Genre: RPS AU, Crack
Summary: Jared learns the wonders of Christmas
Word count: 742
Disclaimer: I own jack, least of all Jared and Jensen. This is also very, very much fiction.
Nearly one whole year had passed since a benevolent fairy had granted Jared's wish, and he was adapting to human life quite well. His job as a taste tester was going great, and life - as well as sex - with his Jensen was glorious and only getting better as the days went on. Sure, sometimes Jensen could be "high maintenance" as humans used to call it, like the time he had spotted their videos on the Internet. Jensen had been so unreasonable, claiming Jared couldn't just tape them during lovemaking and then share the experience with other people online.
And no matter how many times Jared had pointed out how incredibly popular they were, how many enthusiastic fan mail they received, Jensen hadn`t relented. In the end a deeply put-upon Jared had been forced to take down "Bendy Jensen", the Website Jared had so lovingly created in hours upon hours of work. Jensen hadn't even seemed very sorry about it. Thankfully Jared was a very generous and forgiving individual. At least with Jensen he was gladly so accommodating but with others it seemed a bit unfair that Jared should always be the one to make sacrifices because that stupid saying proclaimed that "the bigger person would do so" and Jared usually was the biggest person around.
Now though every grievance was forgotten because a special time of the year had arrived, and Jared was vibrating with excitement. He had come to love human holidays because usually they involved the consumption of lots and lots of food. So far there had been Egg-Day, Pie-Day and his current favourite Turkey-Day. Jensen used other names for them but Jared didn't understand this need to not call things like they truly were.
Jared couldn't imagine anything beating Turkey Day but Jensen assured him this "Christmas" thing would be even better as not only there would be the usual food but also the exchange of nice presents. And since nothing could be better than food Jared assumed said presents would also consist of edible goods. Double score.
"Christmas" also came with a couple of neat traditions. For one there was this mistle toe and while the general idea appealed to Jared very much, it clearly needed some improvement still. So when Jensen came home that evening he found the apartment covered in little pieces of cheese, which Jared had seemingly hung up everywhere. Not that he had the chance to verify this assessment because Jared grabbed him and proceeded to happily kiss him under each and every piece, slowly walking them to the bedroom where Jensen promptly forgot about everything but the way Jared's thrusts nearly drove him straight through the headboard.
Then there was Santa, as Jared understood it a fat man in a thick red coat who would come at night and bring their food-presents. Jensen tried to explain how this Santa-person didn't exist and was a made-up figure for small children but Jared didn't want to take any risks on his first official Christmas as a human. After all benevolent fairies were said to be imaginary too and yet if not for one of them Jared would still pine away after Jensen in his little hole in the wall.
So he put out the plate with cookies, right next to their little Christmas tree with the cheese ball decorations. He looked forward to finding lots and lots of presents under the tree by morning. Jared was good at math and if one added up the presents Jared himself had for Jensen, the ones Jensen surely had for him in return and Santa's presents for both of them, well, that should equal lots.
He tried to stay awake to sneak some glance at Santa but Jensen called to him from the bedroom and well, one had to have priorities. Jensen was already on the bed, naked except for the big red bow wrapped around him and the Santa hat on top of his head. He wore a wide, happy grin and beckoned Jared to him.
"You may open your first present right now."
Jared grinned back. Not all presents needed to be food to look good enough to eat after all. He wondered if in the sense of Christmas spirit Jensen would be willing to share with the downtrodden this time. If Jared put some work into it, "Bendy Jensen" could be up and running again by noon tomorrow. Still, first they clearly needed new material…
* * *
(no subject)
Date: 2008-01-13 02:46 am (UTC)Heh. Thanks for pimping me out and of course it`s always nice to hear people like the stories. Cheeseverse started out as such a silly one-shot, I didn`t actually expect much response to it and now it`s a whole little verse and more to come still.
What is Pie Day? Is that 4th of July?
Yup, I wanted to go with the food theme so I had Jared made the connection between it being an all around American holiday and (apple) pie being symbolic. Kind of a little cheat, I know. :)
And what about Candy Day? Wouldn't Jared love a holiday where everyone is giving out candy?
*headdesk* How could I forget Halloween. Of course Jared would love it. Or maybe if he had a traumatic experience? Hm, I think you just gave me an idea for a new chapter. :D
Thank you so much for the lovely comment.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-01-13 05:23 am (UTC)Oh, goody! I love to hear that there is more still to come!
I found the first story just so charming and sweet, it won my heart. I have always loved fairy tales, and you have created a very charming one. Thank you.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-01-13 01:55 pm (UTC)It all just originated from an image that for some reason shot into my head: a little mouse sitting in front of a photograph of Jensen and gazing at it lovingly. If I had any skills at fanart, that would have been the story cover. :)